Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Episode 11 - Restless

I'm tired. I find myself so restless in trying to impress you. Trying to become a better person.
Trying to become the perfect person. what else can you ask for? what else can you make me?
what else do you want from me?

Do you mind if i ask you the same? "It seems like the current situation. You always hurt the one you love
cause you couldn't get enough. Even though you say you haven't lost any feelings for me, why does it feel that way?
I do want kisses, but is there a point when there is no feeling in it? We've had so much as we can, but we can't do anymore
with the situation at hand. I'm really a night person, I've been dead throughout the days. I haven't been myself and neither have you
Do you still love me like this or do you just remember what you used to love?" - quoted, person knows who he is.
It's funny cause you are right, i do miss the thought of of you, the feeling of everything. But then werent you the one that gave me those thoughts
and those feelings? It's funny how the brain operates the feelings, but it always happens to be pulsing in your chest.
Maybe this is just me but why does life always push you back to my face? Everywhere i look, everywhere i go it has something to do with you.
I can never get you out of my thoughts, NEVER. Maybe if i moved to another school then maybe i would. I'm in a relationship with the things around me.
If you don't believe me, i can name it off. Just let me know if you want me too. & today, what was with today? Those pictures? These nostalgic feelings.
It sickens me, but then it soothes me to the point where i'm just like fuck it. You were right, it did fade. You were right, we'll have our almosts, i have
quite a few on my hands right now but none that'll match what we were. No need to question it. I'm kinda disappointed we interact through here
though. Maybe life keeps pushing you in my face because it's telling me there's just something about you, something special.
Only time will tell, and it just seems like that right now, cause i'm agreeing with you on this one right now, being attached to someone is
most definitely out of the fucking question.

Some good has come out of this. I'm more focused on me, i'm becoming a better person.
Senior year is gonna be my prime. Believe me.
& plus i forgot how it was like to buy shit for just myself now. haha
thanks though, even through this, your one of the best friends & people i have ever met. Don't forget that.
Oh yeeaazz, your pretty damn cute also. Just lettin you know.

I'm one damn busy guy trying to be the best he can be.
Time do my project & upload pictures for yearbook. Ugh what a frickin gay.
Breaking sesh & workout sesh after as usual.
I'll start playing the guitar this weekend.
Photography, the fixie, & basketball can wait cause those are always gonna be surrounding me.

I want to be free. All i'm asking is for Freedom.
oh shit! and its time for a change! no more hats! Cause of fucking alyssa's birthday this weekend.
No hats my ass! whatever Shit's Tight.
PEACE

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